REAPING A MULTIPLE REWARD

For every disciplined effort, there are multiple rewards. That's one of life's great arrangements. In fact, it's an extension of the Biblical law that says that if you sow well, you will reap well.

Here's a unique part of the Law of Sowing and Reaping. Not only does it suggest that we'll all reap what we've sown, it also suggests that we'll reap much more. Life is full of laws that both govern and explain behaviors, but this may well be the major law we need to understand: for every disciplined effort, there are multiple rewards.


What a concept! If you render unique service, your reward will be multiplied. If you're fair and honest and patient with others, your reward will be multiplied. If you give more than you expect to receive, your reward is more than you expect. But remember: the key word here, as you might well imagine, is discipline.


Everything of value requires care, attention, and discipline. Our thoughts require discipline. We must consistently determine our inner boundaries and our codes of conduct, or our thoughts will be confused. And if our thoughts are confused, we will become hopelessly lost in the maze of life. Confused thoughts produce confused results.


Remember the law: "For every disciplined effort, there are multiple rewards." Learn the discipline of writing a card or a letter to a friend. Learn the discipline of paying your bills on time, arriving to appointments on time, or using your time more effectively. Learn the discipline of paying attention, or paying your taxes or paying yourself. Learn the discipline of having regular meetings with your associates, or your spouse, or your child, or your parent. Learn the discipline of learning all you can learn, of teaching all you can teach, of reading all you can read.


For each discipline, multiple rewards. For each book, new knowledge. For each success, new ambition. For each challenge, new understanding. For each failure, new determination. Life is like that. Even the bad experiences of life provide their own special contribution. But a word of caution here for those who neglect the need for care and attention to life's disciplines: everything has its price. Everything affects everything else. Neglect discipline, and there will be a price to pay. All things of value can be taken for granted with the passing of time.


That's what we call the Law of Familiarity. Without the discipline of paying constant, daily attention, we take things for granted. Be serious. Life's not a practice session.


If you're often inclined to toss your clothes onto the chair rather than hanging them in the closet, be careful. It could suggest a lack of discipline. And remember, a lack of discipline in the small areas of life can cost you heavily in the more important areas of life. You cannot clean up your company until you learn the discipline of cleaning your own garage. You cannot be impatient with your children and be patient with your distributors or your employees. You cannot inspire others to sell more when that goal is inconsistent with your own conduct. You cannot admonish others to read good books when you don't have a library card.


Think about your life at this moment. What areas need attention right now? Perhaps you've had a disagreement with someone you love or someone who loves you, and your anger won't allow you to speak to that person. Wouldn't this be an ideal time to examine your need for a new discipline? Perhaps you're on the brink of giving up, or starting over, or starting out. And the only missing ingredient to your incredible success story in the future is a new and self-imposed discipline that will make you try harder and work more intensely than you ever thought you could.


The most valuable form of discipline is the one that you impose upon yourself. Don't wait for things to deteriorate so drastically that someone else must impose discipline in your life. Wouldn't that be tragic? How could you possibly explain the fact that someone else thought more of you than you thought of yourself? That they forced you to get up early and get out into the marketplace when you would have been content to let success go to someone else who cared more about themselves.


Your life, my life, the life of each one of us is going to serve as either a warning or an example. A warning of the consequences of neglect, self-pity, lack of direction and ambition... or an example of talent put to use, of discipline self-imposed, and of objectives clearly perceived and intensely pursued.

First Male Pregnant

As an artist who has had solo exhibitions at The Whitney Museum of American Art and The Cleveland Museum of Art, Lee Mingwei explores the evanescent and diurnal cycles of living. His work is based on such basic human activities as cooking, letterwriting, and now child-bearing.

A few weeks ago, writer Janice Versalius of PaperVeins magazine had a long and
intimate conversation with Mr. Lee in his Manhattan apartment. An excerpt of the interview appears below. Additional interviews with Mr. Lee will also be included in the upcoming film documentary.

Janice
Mr. Lee, as we just discussed, male pregnancy may prove to be an extremely dangerous medical procedure at this point – particularly when your doctors perform your Cesarian operation. Why have you chosen to do this?

Mr. Lee
A lot of people have cast this endeavor as something terribly monstrous – a startling example of how science and medicine have simply gone too far. From my perspective, however, I am simply bringing a child into this world. There is nothing more natural and beautiful on this earth than that. This is something that I've always wanted to do.

Janice
But surely you understand why some people find the idea of a pregnant man disturbing?

Mr. Lee
Well, I understand how it may be a shocking concept at first. Biologically, women have always given birth to children, and men have not. Despite the dramatic results of the sexual revolution in the latter half of this century, there are still very distinct and concrete social roles determined by this... until now... undeniable biological fact. Now, it seems, we have several important questions to consider. Why shouldn't men carry children and care for a fetus the same way a women does? Why shouldn't a man bear a burden that women have always carried? On the other hand, why shouldn't a man be able to experience the same joy and excitement that a pregnant woman feels nurturing a child within her own body? Now I think men, as well as women, have more choices, more possibilities, more roles they can assume in their lives.

Janice
I can tell you that my father for one would have donated all his internal organs before even entertaining the idea of getting pregnant.

Mr. Lee
Yes, it's interesting that many men feel very threatened by this idea. Men getting pregnant used to be a big joke – a point of ridicule. Someone was telling me about this popular American film where Arnold Schwarzenegger's character became pregnant. The humor was based on the sheer absurdity of such a distinct feminine condition being imposed on someone who represented the ultimate paradigm of Western masculinity. It seems like something rooted in a preoccupation with very traditional gender role assumptions. There was also an episode of The Cosby Show, apparently, where the male characters dreamed they were all pregnant. Now that pregnant men are a reality, no one is laughing anymore!

Janice
I was thinking about how a lot of sitcoms, particularly in the 70's and 80's, were always filled with men dressing up women to get laughs. But when men in real life actually wanted to dress up as women, they were usually harassed or beaten up.

Mr. Lee
That's a good analogy. Drag was once considered something provocative, bizarre, and unnatural. Now we even have the mayor of New York dressing up as a woman on live television. Did you hear about that?

Janice
I remember seeing it last year on Saturday Night Live. I thought I was hallucinating.

Mr. Lee
But, he still did it for laughs. I think many drag queens who were drawn to the subversion of drag – the shock value of it – are somewhat disappointed at how mainstream it has become. And at the same time, I see many transvestites who are still marginalized by both gay and straight people. If you're a man who actually wants to become a woman, without the intent of performing or putting on a show, then you're still considered weird.

Janice
How would you respond to people who would consider you a pregnant transvestite and not a pregnant man?

Mr. Lee
Well, it's not really accurate. I'm still male afterall – biologically and anatomically. It's interesting that some people believe the definition of being a man is so precarious! And unlike the men who feel this strong desire to physically become women, I've never wished for that ... and I haven't done that. I have, however, always wanted to have a much stronger empathy with women. I love my mother and sister very much, and I'm very happy to share in something they have both experienced. Being pregnant is a wonderful feeling. It's something that all human beings – both men and women – should experience before they die. This process has been a spiritual rebirth for me.

Janice
I was just reading about one of your art projects – A Hundred Days With Lily. You have also described it as spiritually renewing experience.

Mr. Lee
Yes. I carried a handful of white lilies for three months with me wherever I went. It was in honor of my grandmother who had passed away, to pay respect to her in some small way.

Janice
I read that this was something rooted in Ch'an Buddhism. Is that correct?

Mr. Lee
The idea is rooted in Ch'an Buddhism. I had spent many years growing up in a Buddhist monastery in Taiwan. We learned to appreciate the simple, transient, and everyday moments in life.

Janice
Well, I must say, a pregnant man isn't something you see everyday.

Mr. Lee
Actually, I see this pregnancy as being very much in keeping with Buddhist philosophical thought. There is a strong connection I feel between myself, the child within my body, and the world around us both. And I think there is a greater awareness and empathy I now share with my mother and sister as a result of my pregnancy. Most of all, there is a level of insight and understanding about being alive – of sharing your life – in ways that I've never realized before.

Janice
I've talked with other pregnant people who have also described this sensation. I felt it strongly myself when I had my own daughter a few years ago... One last question, Mr. Lee. Do you have a name for your baby yet?

Mr. Lee
I think I'll only know the name when the child is born. I guess we'll have to wait and see!